Sunday, March 4, 2012

NEW FACES (AHEM!) IN HOLLYWOOD


I was watching SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE last evening and I think Lindsay Lohan hosted. It looked kind of like her anyway, but I couldn’t be sure just who it was. The woman appeared to be so full of Botox, collagen and peroxide, I couldn’t be sure if it was Lohan or some impersonator. Maybe even a drag queen. Is it any wonder my eyes were perplexed? The troubled ingénue has gone through so many different looks and styles that I can’t recognize her anymore. And the bee stung lips and puffy cheeks she sported last night looked more like a caricature rather than the real thing. 
Lindsay Lohan looking under the influence...of Botox, perhaps?

The trouble with actors like Lohan is that they now rely all kinds of  casual plastic surgery to fix whatever little problem areas they have, but they don't realize it's all eradicating their very recognizability. We’ve all seen actors or actresses go away for a few months, then return with bigger boobs, tighter jaw lines, saucer eyes, or immobile foreheads. So why should Lohan think it's any big deal to do her cheeks or lips or hair or whatever she's doing while she's away? 


Did anyone else out there gasp a little bit when Sandra Bullock showed up to present at the Oscars last week? I could be wrong, but it appeared she had undergone some 'work.' She had that Cher thing going where her face looked rigid and frozen, a bit like a Madame Tussaud figure. There is something wrong when  eyes start to rise up in the corners like they’re trying to be those in the bottle from the animated opening of I DREAM OF JEANNIE, don't you think? 
Do Sandra's eyes on the right (from the 2012 Oscars) look a bit higher than they did from the 2010 Oscars on the left?

The ruination of faces from plastic surgery is as old as Michael Jackson’s first chemical peel. Especially with actresses. Not every one can be as talented as Meryl Streep, so they need to find ways to stay relevant. Plus, Hollywood is so brutal to women, with so few good roles for them, that it's easy for actresses to succumb to the knife just to stay in the game. As Goldie Hawn’s character in THE FIRST WIVES CLUB observed, there are only three phases for actresses - “Babe, district attorney and driving Miss Daisy.” 


And few actresses in their 40’s are ready to become Jessica Tandy.But now, the obsession with staying young seems to be happening to men just as much. Men are having pec implants, calf implants, you name it. All in all, Hollywood has turned into a land where 'no age' is par for the course. It's like pod people have taken over. Aliens seem to be walking around Tinsel Town masquerading as former leading men and women.
Those like George Clooney know how to leave well enough alone.

Thank God for those like George Clooney who don't cave to the pressure. He’s fifty and doesn't disguise that fact. And he doesn’t color his hair or try to quash the bags under his eyes. But that doesn’t stop those in Hollywood from suggesting maybe he should spruce it up a bit. 

Now it's a constant drumbeat from every corner of the town. Every minor imperfection seems to be a call for half the Internet to intercede and offer their criticism. And bloggers can be absolutely merciless. Jean Dujardin had barely won his Oscar last week and the Hollywood pundits started talking about how he needed to have his teeth whitened and straightened. How sad. 
Jean Dujardin flashes his imperfect but charming smile on Oscar night.






And to what end do the insane demands lead? The town is strewn with far too many stories of ruin. Karen Carpenter starved herself to death. Jennifer Grey had a nose job that rendered her almost unrecognizable. And Michael Jackson peeled away his face is in a hopeless bid to be more accepted. Ugly business all that.

That's why I love those who fight it. Bravo to Charlize Theron and Gwyneth Paltrow for refusing to augment their breasts. Cheers to  Adrian Brody for not touching his nose. I salute Christopher Plummer for reveling in being an octogenarian. So, please, please, please, Jean Dujardin, do not change your smile. Bite the hand that feeds you and keep your imperfect but perfectly adorable incisors. 

4 comments:

  1. The worst thing about these celebs butchering their faces in the name of youth is that they end up not looking younger but looking stranger. If just one celebrity besides Meryl Streep could say no the knife it would make other actresses-and real people-feel a lot less insecure.

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  2. Your side-by-side pictures of Sandra Bullock don't look 'that' different. Make-up, hairstyle and lighting have a lot to do with the difference in the two pictures. The jawline is the same, the ears, cheeks and nose look the same. The 'shape' of the eyes is a little different, but is any of that due to the hairstyle, lighting, make-up, or perhaps even squinting. But look at the little lines at the outer edge of her left eye ... no real difference there. The lighting and make-up makes here look 'paler' in 2012. The biggest difference I see is that in the 2010 picture, she appears to have a bump on the right side of her nose.

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  3. Whogas, I grant you, it's not the best side-by-side comparison photos of Bullock. (The outside corners of the eyes are a giveaway though. Look closely.) And if you saw her on TV you could readily see a difference. Granted, there are more striking examples of such in Hollywood, but she seems to have succumbed to the pressure to stay younger looking. Sigh.

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  4. And Anonymous, I wholly agree with you! Meryl looks great and she still looks like Meryl! More power to her and those who accept aging and do so gracefully.

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