Thursday, February 17, 2011

IS IT JUST ME?


Today, I’m feeling a little snarky. So here, for your amusement, dear followers, are my thoughts on movies for the day. Some, a bit on the pissy side. Let me know what you’re thinking. And do B.Y.O.B. (Bring your own bile.)

Is it just me…
Or was the most underrated movie last year THE GHOST WRITER? (How come the  European Awards picked it as best picture and the Academy didn't even nominate it? For anything!) 

Is it just me…
Or was Minka Kelly sexier in two minutes at the end of 500 DAYS OF SUMMER than in all of THE ROOMMATE? (Esquire magazine should retract their award.) 
And is it just me…
But was 127 HOURS the most overrated? (It was good, but cripes, it felt like that long just to get to the inevitable arm-cutting scene.)

Is it just me…
But does it seem like Christopher Nolan is channeling Joel Schumacher stacking too many stars in his next Batman movie? (Hope Anne Hathaway, Tom Hardy, Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Marion Cotillard aren’t all playing villains.)

Speaking of villains, is it just me…
Or was the greatest Bond villain of all-time Alan Rickman in DIE HARD? Even though it’s not a Bond film. (Let’s hope Bond 22 can come up with a 007 adversary just as worthy as Hans Gruber.)


Is it just me...
But wasn’t the rowing scene in THE SOCIAL NETWORK a better action scene than anything Michael Bay has ever directed? (And now he’s going to destroy my town Chicago in the next TRANSFORMERS movie. Thanks, Mike.)

Is it just me…
But don’t you find that the charm of young Hollywooders Jesse Eisenberg, Jennifer Lawrence, Andrew Garfield, Hailee Steinfeld, Justin Timberlake, Mila Kunis and Armie Hammer almost makes up for the charmless Lindsay Lohan? (No? Still a train wreck? So it is.)

And is it just me…
Or are you waiting for Lindsay to turn into Sean Young and go the full crazy and storm Chris Nolan’s trailer insisting she be cast as Catwoman instead of Hathaway? (Meow, kitten, where'd you get that necklace?)

Is it just me…
Or are you miffed that 1 out of every 4 movies due out this year is going to be a sequel? (How many more chipmunks and Cap’n Jack do we need?)

Is it just me…
Or did Melissa Leo seriously damage her Academy Awards chances with her vainglorious “I’m 50 and can be glamorous” Oscar campaign? (And wouldn’t it be terribly ironic if she lost votes because of it and thus lost to her youngest competitor Hailee Steinfeld?)


Is it just me…
But isn’t everyone in the TWILIGHT movies just way too friggin’ serious? (I know I’m not the target audience, but c'mon, I laughed a helluva lot when I was a teenager.)

And is it just me…
Or must Bella smell like a Cinnabon? Otherwise, why does every vampire in Forks, Washington want to eat her? (Geez, not one girl in town smells like Chile’s hot wings? Not even the girls who work there?)

Is it just me…
Or do you think Adam Sandler is f**cking with us? (He’s gotta know some of those movies suck, right?)

Is it just me…
But isn’t TAKEN the best awful movie you’ve seen in the last decade? (Every time I pass it on cable, I have to watch, I can’t help myself!)

And is it just me…
Or will you also be going to see UNKNOWN opening weekend. (What is it with Liam Neeson having so many problems traveling in Europe? I don't know, but I love it.)

Is it just me…
But shouldn’t Eric Roberts be getting better roles? (He looks amazing. And is very, very talented. So what gives?)


Is it just me…
But don’t you know all those birthers out there hate Sidney Poitier movies too? (Bet they lost their shit when he informed Rod Steiger, “They call me Mister Tibbs!”)

Is it just me…
But isn’t it cool that Trent Reznor is doing film scores? (And getting Oscar nominations too?)

Is it just me…
Or don’t Robert Redford, Michael Caine, Robert Duvall, Gene Hackman, John Williams, Sidney Lumet, Shirley MacLaine and Woody Allen all deserve the American Film Institute’s Lifetime Achievement Award before Morgan Freeman? (Don’t get me wrong, he’s worthy. But in 10 more years.)
  Is it just me…
But isn’t George Clooney the coolest man on the planet these days? (Wonder if he still has the pet pig…even that was kinda cool.)

And finally, is it just me…
But isn’t MODERN FAMILY better comedy than any movie comedy in the last 10 years? (Cue gasp.)

It isn't just me, is it?

4 comments:

  1. Jeff
    I love the blog, keep the posts coming. Oh, and I'm also an inexplicable 'Taken' fan.
    Cheers

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  2. Thanks, Dwayne. So glad you're following. And we'll definitely have to share thoughts on Neeson's latest UNKNOWN which opens tomorrow. I'll be there for the first matinee!

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  3. Is it just me...
    Or were there some good films in 2010 that played in few theaters much too briefly, such as SOLITARY MAN, CYRUS, NOWHERE BOY, I LOVE YOU PHILLIP MORRIS and RABBIT HOLE, thereby not finding the audience they should have?

    Is it just me...
    Or was the “old school” live action filmed in UNSTOPPABLE often more exciting than some of the standard CGI fare that is so common today? And isn’t this a film that works best, by far, on the big screen?

    And is it just me...
    Or is it odd that the widely-used Fandango website cannot completely confirm all films playing in specific theaters for the following Friday, until practically the day before?

    Finally, is it just me...
    Or are there some movies, (and I hate to discourage artistic expression), like THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE, that perhaps just should not be made at all?

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  4. Love your thoughts FWNN. BTW I have not seen THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE, and really don't want to. Ick.

    ReplyDelete